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Well, yesterday we finally got son's 1st quarter Japanese grade, an 'A', the first he's gotten in the subject. After all the years of hectoring from his mother, you'd think she'd have said something -like 'Hey, you did it, I knew could!'. Nope, which did not go unnoticed by son. So the box score is 1 'B' and the rest, 'A's'. Almost night and day from his junior year performance, which wasn't horrible, but was desultory. Its sobering to realize that may have been influenced by my own unemployed and at home situation.
I 'get' the why's of lack of fulsome praise from his mother and in general why Asian parents don't jump up and down for joy when their children bring home outstanding academic reports; its 当り前. But this isn't Asia, as I have reminded his mother and that it wouldn't hurt to show son how pleased you are with his school work. The reaction to that has been along the lines of 'so he should be praised for even having a successful bowel movement?'
One of the many things I have learned in life is, life is a matter of balances and that sure any parent especially one suffering from 親ばか can go overboard with the praise for children. On the other hand, culture aside, people are people and a good word after some good performance won't bring the world order down either.
Have always wondered how healthy the reluctance of Japanese/Asian parents to show some outward joy and appreciation of their children's' performance to their children really is and how such affects personality?
Son is still steaming about that Japan club. Spent most of last night, with only a break for his calculus homework, creating a PowerPoint presentation on the Japanese kana system to use at the next club meeting. He wouldn't even stop to sit down for dinner; a trait he displayed early in life when he'd focus on Leggo, building something from loose blocks or putting together a kit and would not stop until he finished/was satisfied.
What really got his goat, or whatever was being 'called out' as he puts it by what he called 2 white girls(his words), for not knowing Japanese language as well as they think they do. Granted he has a far better grasp of the language, but he makes mistakes too; like referring to lower classmates as ９年生、１１年生, etc., when it should be高校１年生, etc. Likewise he usedクラブ大統領 when perhaps it should be クラブリーダ or クラブ部長(?).
I am disappointed in him focusing on race though. I've spoken to him on a couple of occasions about what I see as racial balkanization here, that here one is conditioned to think in terms of what you are defines you first, not who you are, and how silly that all is. An important point given his racial/ cultural mix. Need to find an opening to talk about that again.
But on the bright side, while son was also using girls as a bit of a pejorative he wasn't going as far as his uncle Pound Salt goes in 'referring to' women. Second, spending a school night putting a PowerPoint presentation on his own is not a bad use of time (wish he'd show the same in prepping for the ACT/SAT tests he is to take next month). It could be worse; Son has told me some of the kids he hung around with in elementary school are doing drugs now.
Remembered yesterday, an observation of Auto Gal's of son during one of large international automobile manufacturer #2's pool parties of yore.
Picked him up yesterday from school as he had stayed to attend a meeting of a Japan Club and he went to see what it was all about. He got in and I could see the smoke coming from his ears. What was up? Well, there was an election of who would run the club and he lost by one vote. He said he wouldn't be so angry had he lost on ability, but he told me the choice was between him and 2 girls (one who came up with the idea and her friend).. The girls I was told carried the day with her friends, so it was popularity contest in his words.
My fatherly comment was , 1.) It was their idea , so you'd have to expect them to want to lead the club, 2.) This sort of stuff happens a lot as you will find as you go on in life, 3.) If you had been chosen, you'd have been expected to shoulder the burden for work and would you have been willing to do that? (He said, 'yes') and last, perhaps he can work with them or around them. Had to repeat this number of time last night as he kept ranting about this again and again.
Alpha Male indeed.
Saw this, this morning during my morning web sweep.
The cultural insensitivity and painful frog-in-the-well syndrome displayed by yet another senior Japanese government official is just amazing. I suppose Mr. Ozawa would like to see 踏絵 in place at every区 &市役所 or 役場 with the requirements they be used upon registering a birth or that you have moved into their jurisdiction?
And I am not falling in the trap about whose religion is more self-righteous than whose. Religion is a good thing. Its only when its tenets are grossly misinterpreted and put into practice that humanity is the worse for it.
And sure everyone is entitled to their own opinions, but when one rises to a senior position anywhere, that right becomes a bit fuzzy as the line between what you believe in and what is could be policy that affects many becomes thin.
Last, what does this say of how engaged Japan really is in the world community? Taken at face value, I'd say all the discussion about 国際化 that I've heard ever since the yen was 361 to the dollar, is mostly lip service.
Am getting the silent treatment from son this morning; there's a OMG I must have paint ball gun someone has for sale on Craigslist. Now he has enough money in his bank account for it and then leave him about $200 in change.
But despite him being 18+ and its his money, I've put my foot down and said absolutely 'no' in bold, italicized and underlined. So he's throwing a hissy fit.
Wonder what'd be like if I had an 18+ year old daughter who I told she could not buy whatever.........?
Later this evening, John Mohammad, the man sentenced to death for his part in the DC sniper serial murders will most likely no longer be alive.
I've thought about it a bit; it must be strange, no macabre I guess, to wake this morning to know this will be the last time to greet a new morning. It almost begs the point, 'Why bother?'
But he's got it easy; the people whose deaths he is responsible for had no inkling when they woke on their fateful day that the hours they would remain alive on this earth were finite. And like 9/11, its hard to explain, perhaps it is unexplainable for those who weren't there to appreciate the enormity of his crime.
Until they were apprehended, he and his accomplice held the greater DC metro area in terror and in thrall in a way that touched all. Personally a couple of things stand out for me as markers of that time. One was a Saturday morning perhaps in the middle of the murder spree (I don't call it anything else; it is what it is), I was out on an errand and noticed just how light the traffic was. People, out of terror just stayed home. Likewise at a gas station very near home, after one shooting farther south at a gas station, the owner of this station put up a tarp the shield customers. This is a photo of that gas station.
And then there was the day we were out on the road and on the radio there was a report of a shooting farther south and further to the report (erroneous) of a white van. Shortly afterwards we saw a white van pulled over, its driver with hands on head, scared, bewildered, the mob of police officers surrounding him and his vehicle -deadly serious.
And of the victims, two stand out. One a man whose wife was killed in a nearby Home Depot, right before his eyes, and a young boy, who nearly died had it not been for he was with an aunt, a trained ER nurse and got him the immediate medical attention which saved his live.
So am I lusting for blood? Depends on your point of view. I don't see myself as such. His crimes are what they are, cold and calculated. He made his choices and the consequences are what he will face tonight.
Spotted 2 steaks yesterday, marked down nearly half price which seemed odd as the cuts seemed still fairly fresh. But what the hell, son has a damned decent report card (one B and the rest A's) and thought he deserved a nice reward. BTW, after all these years of hectoring him, there was almost nothing in the way of any 'attaboy' comment from his mother, but that's not the main point here.
So I started to grille one of the cuts for his dinner. Its a huge piece as you can see below; enough at least for 2 if not 3 people's portions in Japan I think. Told him to season it up to his liking and then I'd get cooking. He wanted to put a couple of slices of bacon over, around -whatever the steak. Said 'no' to that-that's just overkill, or excess for the sake of excess. Can't imagine how it'd improve the steak either.
Was also in for a surprise later has he pretty much finished off the entire thing.
My son, the carnivore
Is advice given to me by a parent, a person with who I've worked with closely over the years at large international automobile manufacturer #1, who has also gone before me so to speak in raising children.
His point is that between the ages of 13 to say 22, parents are in the eyes of their children, hopelessly stupid, so his advice has been don't add to one's frustration by offering advice based on your accumulated wisdom.
Case in point, son is now working, sporadically, but at least working on, his college applications. One for a big school in Columbus, Ohio, and another for another school in Ohio, but not a large one. The first thing I tried to tell him was not to start in pen on the original copy he has as slip ups and 'wait a minute, maybe I ought to say...' happen. But noooooooo. So now one is marked up and spotted with correction fluid. Lucky for him, fresh applications can be readily downloaded on-line now.
He's also got a cousin, now a grad student at the big school in Columbus, who's been through the process and an excellent source of help. Have told son to keep in touch with this cousin of his, particular for pointers-suggestions for the 'Why I want to..' essay son must write. Again, he's not doing that partly as he somehow sees getting outside assistance as cheating. Have told him there is no way he can do this alone and that there is a big difference in getting ideas and suggestions and having someone write this essay for you.
Last are priorities. He's got some hard deadlines looming. First getting the applications finished by Thanksgiving and then preparing himself for retaking the SAT and going over the ACT, which he has never taken. So what are his priorities? Well there 's on Craigslist, a new paintball gun offered for sale, locally too, that he must have. My response if he's got time to think about that, he's also got time to deal with the things he must deal with within the next month, and that I do not want the hear anymore about the paintball gun.
Can't wait to see what he's like post 22 years of age.
Can't resist poking fun at an ex-competitor!
(From The Onion)
Between 2 loads of washing and scrubbing up after the dog threw up not once, but twice on the carpet (thanks a lot!) I reworked that pesky resume and have it away for a look by another set of eyes. Nth time the charm? At least today feels a bit productive
The attached photo is for to show what you as an owner get into when the pet you have is a Golden Retriever.
